Journeys: Judy Reitman


Date: November 14, 2002
Email: jlreitman@adelphia.net

I first heard about M when I was 15 years old and I was in 10th grade in May of 1972. I was outside my high school when a young woman (maybe 18 years old) gave me a leaflet and said that "he" could show you God and you could see him face to face. I remember looking at the picture of M in his Krishna outfit and I thought that he looked mentally retarded. It was a strange picture of him and I never did see it again in any photos. So I went to the ashram at 48th and Springfield in Philadelphia. It was a wonderful old, large stone house. The living room appeared large since there was no furniture and the aroma of Nag Champa incense permeated the room. I don't really remember much except being with my older brother who had just received Knowledge. He was completely into it and within two weeks, he took me to New York City to receive Knowledge. I guess I lied to my parents about where I was going that weekend. The New York ashram was packed with so many people, but I remember feeling some great energy and being buzzed. I think I saw M one night but don't remember much. Then I received Knowledge from Fakiranand in a 12 hour knowledge session. I remember the Mahatma asking people what time they got up in the morning and he was shocked when people said they slept until 10:00 a.m. When revealed the first technique, my eyeballs were pressed so hard by Fakiranand, that I saw some blue flashes. My older brother seemed so proud that his little sister had received K. The next day we drove to the NY residence and I remember the white sheets with rose petals for the holy family to walk upon. It was all so surreal. Then I looked through these two branches of a tree and M looked at me. I remember his one devotee with a large moustache and someone said he was the reincarnation of Krishna's side kick.

I practiced K a bit, but was getting ready to travel with my family to California for the summer. I didn't practice K much that summer, but I remember singing a one of the songs "You are my mother.....I knew my life had changed and when I got the book, Be Here Now, it all seemed so clear to me.

After returning and entering my junior year of high school from 72 to 73 I was very active going to satsang and my brother and best friend lived in premie house. I remember my girlfriend falling in love with another premie and telling me that had sex in front of the alter. I was shocked that she did that, but unfortunately the guy dumped her and it really messed her up emotionally. She never was the same after that and I remember her telling me that she never felt devotion. I couldn't understand where she was coming from.

Once I graduated in 1974, I wasn't too involved and started partying, having sex and being a normal teenager. Over the next several years, I was involved with non premies. I was living with someone who wasn't a premie and he was extremely abusive and messed up from being in Vietnam. One night he came home and beat the crap out of me. I thought my life was over and as I layed on the bed, I prayed to Maharaji to save me and at that moment he fell asleep and I ran home to parents house in the snow in my pajamas for about one mile. After that experience I got into M and K again. I finally met a premie and we married, and went to programs when our schedules permitted. I very rarely meditated, but I always felt the pull to see M. In 1982 we went to a program in Miami and then we were off to vacation in Jamaica. I remember doing coke after a few of the programs and just thinking what is all this shit about. If I am so satisfied with K, then why am I snorting coke right after seeing "the Lord". It was getting ridiculous then and I couldn't wait to get to Jamaica and really party and have a good time.

So fast forward to the early 80's and beyond. Still going to a few programs. M came to this small town I was living then on the central coast in 1988. He was there on vacation and staying in the campgrounds with his motor home with Marolyn and the kids. There were only a handful of premies living in this town and our premie friend was the park ranger of this state park. We went to the campgrounds as they were public and starting walking towards M's camp site. Well, there he was walking with Marolyn and we didn't want to appear to conspicuous so my husband and I walked over to a tree to admire the lichen. We felt like we were intruding, but we wanted to see our Lord. One day later, my husband was asked to make a tray of pastries and we delivered them to M that night. Marolyn was excited because we included some chocolate chip cookies and she said she had a dream about the cookies. M never said a word to us except maybe a weak hello and then he went to help his son pump air into a mattress. We didn't stay very long and we had heard Daya had eaten too many sweets and was very sick. Our friends who worked at the camp grounds got to hang out with them a bit more. But very secretive about any details. Of course, I was jealous and wished I could have hung out with the Lord too.

Over the next few years, attended less and less programs, but my husband was asked to bake the events in India in 1995 and was there for 4 weeks. He said it was a great experience and the westerners were treated very well. Then he went to Amaroo in 1996 through 1999 and it put such a financial hardship on us, that our marriage eventually ended in divorce besides his bouts of depression and alcoholism.

The irony was that I only recently discovered the epo site last week due to my ex-husband. He was visiting our son and had logged on to the epo site on my computer. I checked the drop down arrow and saw ex-premie.org and thought what the hell is this. I haven't stop reading it since. I now am one of many that have come to the realization that M is a total sham. I have come to terms with it all very quickly because I knew my experience with K in the last two decades has been limited and not really providing me with the blissful feelings I want to feel. I purged myself of all the cd's, cassette tapes, videos books and pictures. As I threw them into the dumpster, I said "bye-bye Maharaji".

Now I can move on with my life which has is looking brighter and brighter than ever before.
L'Chaim (To Life)


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